This morning we took our walk in a random place – through the canal shops of the Venetian and Palazzo hotels in Las Vegas. We stayed there last night as a halfway point between where we were staying in Scottsdale and home. Not sure the kids could do a ten-hour car ride, so breaking it up was a smart idea. They really did great.
When we stopped there on our way down, we took the kids and walked around the shops early in the morning, and not surprisingly, Vegas is pretty quiet at 7:00am! We pretty much had the place all to ourselves, with the exception of a few security and custodial staff. The kids loved being able to actually get out of the stroller and run around (which we absolutely did not allow when we walked around the night before). It was a really wonderful experience. We also threw some coins into the canal in honor of our sweet Benny – pennies for Benny. We all said “For Benny” as we tossed them in. We really miss him and are grateful for moments when we’re reminded of him and can do little things in his memory.
This morning as we walked around the canal shops before we started the final drive home, it was again very quiet. Vegas is just not a morning town, but as morning people, it makes it pretty delightful for us. The kids enjoyed running around and we enjoyed some of the peace and quiet. When we got to the canal, Isaac asked if he could throw in a “penny for Benny.” It warmed my heart that he remembered. Thankfully I had a few coins. As Isaac and then Zoey tossed them in, I noticed the ripples in the water. I hadn’t noticed them last time. And it made me think about the ripples in our lives. Whether it be from a tiny coin or a tiny boy, our lives are full of ripples. We may not notice them, but if we do, it can be pretty awesome.
Our sweet Benny has caused so many beautiful ripples in our lives. As I pondered on them throughout the day, I’ve been filled with such light. And, one of the incredible ways his ripples continue to bless our lives is through the service of others. Goodness, we have received so much service lately. I feel so undeserving of the love and acts of kindness. We have seen the gospel in action through the Christlike compassion and charity of those around us. And then to hear about the service being given by others in honor of our sweet boy? Words can’t express the feelings in our heart at the way the ripples of Benny’s goodness continue.
As part of today’s #LightTheWorld Christmas campaign, we were encouraged to think of someone who did something kind for us recently and return the favor. Goodness, where do we even begin? Unfortunately some favors can’t be adequately returned, at least not right now. Or even properly thanked, because there are no words that fully express the deep gratitude we feel. Since no return act or words of thanks could in any way come close to acknowledging the goodness and love we’ve received, I’ve been praying each night that somehow the Lord will bless the lives of those who have blessed us. That He will fill the hearts of those who have served our family with Benny’s light and goodness. He has that ability beyond what my words or actions could do, so I pray with all my heart that the kindness we’ve received will come back to others through Him and that they will be blessed for all they’ve done.
Heavenly Father, please bless those who have blessed us. Please touch the hearts of those who have gone out of their way to extend love to our family.
Please bless those who have sent messages through texts, and social media, and emails, and letters, and cards in the mail, and even voicemail. Each has meant so much to us, even if we haven’t been able to respond.
Please bless the friends who didn’t wait for a call the morning our sweet boy passed away and just walked in to put their arms around us.
Please bless the good people who showed up with meals and groceries and paper products and flowers on that difficult day.
Please bless those who took in our sweet Isaac and Zoey and loved them that day, without question. And who gave our sweet babies little gifts, so they would have joy and know they weren’t alone.
Please bless those who have shown up for visits in the days since. From neighbors to family members to mission companions to college roommates and even work colleagues, seeing those we love has filled our hearts with love and goodness that we’ll forever be grateful for.
Please bless the kind young men in our ward who filled our yard with hand-cut hearts and incredibly sweet messages that lifted us when we needed it most.
Please bless those who brought meals. And sent meals. And sent money for meals. And arranged meals. The ease of not having to think about what we’re going to eat or make for dinner has taken such a burden off our shoulders.
Please bless those who sent flowers and plants to bring happiness and beauty to our home in the days after we lost our boy. Goodness, I love flowers and it made our home such a beautiful place during those difficult days.
Please bless those who have given us gifts that bring our hearts comfort during this time. A picture, a necklace, a bracelet, a teddy bear, a blanket, a book, an ornament, cupcakes from our favorite bakery, hand and foot molds of our sweet boy, an embroidered blanket with Benny’s name, a hand-drawing of our family, a drawing of Benny’s yellow funeral flowers, a statue, and even just some money and gift cards. Every single one has touched our heart as a selfless act of kindness and will be a wonderful memory of our sweet boy.
Please touch the hearts of those who have been praying for us. Please help us to be an answer to their prayers if we can. We have felt the prayers of so many and know they have sustained and uplifted us.
Please bless those who have cried with us. Who have shed tears on our behalf. Who have given us a shoulder to cry on when we needed it. Who have sat with us in the silence when there were no words. Who have been there for us when we needed them most.
Please bless those who have ministered to us during our time of need, beyond what their church calling may be.
Please bless the wonderful people who we’ve met or grown closer to as a result of this experience. Please help those who have also suffered to have their hearts uplifted knowing the comfort they’ve provided us by sharing their own similar experiences.
Please bless those we work with who have been kind and understanding of our need to grieve and take time away, from our bosses, to our colleagues, to our incredible daycare provider. Please help those who have stepped in where needed and done so without hesitation to know of our gratitude.
Please, Father, bless those who went above and beyond to help us make Benny’s final arrangements. Please bless the wonderful funeral home director for his extra attention and kindness. And the ward members who took time out of their lives to set things up and decorate and make a memorial video. And the wonderful people we’ve never even met who extended their love in the planning efforts. And those who helped arrange a meal for our family after the service. We’re so grateful to have that otherwise difficult day be a sweet memory for our family.
Please bless the kind children in our neighborhood who have delivered cookies, and notes, and handmade gifts. We especially have appreciated the kindness of children and their pure goodness that reminds us of Benny.
Please bless those who took the time to hang blue ribbons in our neighborhood to remind us of our sweet Benny.
Please bless everyone who has stepped in and helped with Isaac and Zoey during these past few weeks, when we just couldn’t. Our sweet babies have needed extra attention and love, and they have received it from some incredible people in our lives. Please bless those who have loved our babies as their own and selflessly given their time and energy to our beautiful children.
Please bless those strangers who, without knowing, have still shown us kindness and consideration in our passing and interactions.
Please bless those who have done acts of service in Benny’s name to honor his memory. We’re so grateful some of these have been shared with our family so we can also feel of their light and keep record of the goodness of so many.
Father, please, please bless those who have shown us our Savior’s love through their kindness, and goodness, and love these past few weeks. Please help them to know of our gratitude and what their love has meant to our family. Please fill them with our Savior’s light and with our sweet Benny’s light and return their goodness a hundredfold.
Benny’s ripples have made a difference in so many ways. We’ve seen his light through the service of others, and we are anxious to find ways to continue making ripples in memory of him as we look for ways to serve others as we have been served. It seems that’s the only way we’ll ever be able to truly show our gratitude – by taking the love we’ve received and sharing it forward.
Just like one tiny coin can make ripples through a large pool of water, one tiny boy has made ripples in the lives and hearts of so many. As his mama, I’m so proud of that. I love the impact he’s made and feel blessed that I get to be a witness to the goodness. Because there have been so many ripples of goodness. More than our sweet Benny probably could have even imagined. More than we could have imagined. It’s simply incredible.
I’m so thankful I took the time to notice those ripples today with our “pennies for Benny.” It brought so much light to my life just when I needed it as I reflected on the ripples of goodness in our lives from so many.
Ripples. What a simple but truly inspiring thing.
I’m speechless at the beauty of this prayer and the ripple effect of goodness from your little Benny.